Thursday, May 17, 2007

guide: the chicago panhandling technique

It's tragic, it's heart-breaking.

But I'll be damned if it isn't interesting how a majority of the Chicago Loop's panhandlers employ a very specific technique for signaling their request for your change. I've never seen this technique in use in any other city.

The Chicago Loop does have its share of the classic global techniques such as the Hand-Printed Sign or the Laying on the Sidewalk or the very successful Guy Drumming on Plastic Tubs. Today I witnessed the saddest technique of all - Woman with Printed Sign and Child in Stroller.

But these are the exceptions to the dominant Chicago Panhandling Technique.

1. Obtain plastic cup.
2. Fill cup with a large quantity of coins (see Note 1 for quantity guidelines).
3. Stand still in one place.
4. Rattle cup.
5. Say absolutely nothing.
6. Repeat steps 3 through 5 (see Note 2 below for frequency distribution)

Note 1 - having a few lone coins in your cup won't produce the distinctive sound required of the Chicago Panhandling Technique. You need about an inch of coins. I have yet to walk past a serious practitioner with only a few coins bouncing around.

Note 2 - a typical rattle sequence goes like this: two or three shakes, then a pause for three to five beats. Yes, it's arrhythmic, but I think it's supposed to be. If the Chicago Panhandling Technique followed a 4/4 or 6/8 rhythm, you wouldn't hear it.


Anonymous said...

On an interesting side note: "Seeding" is the common practice of padding your change cup/saxophone case with the first few inches worth of cash. This has the distinct psychological benefit of causing passer byer's donations to feel more "justified".

"Wow, look how much other people have contributed already, I should do the same."

If you ever find yourself begging for change, remember to save some of your earnings for the next day!

Organic peregrine terra cotta bricolage cruelty- free locally outsourced maple nut crunch said...

At any rate I'm sick of these f**king people.