Thursday, November 23, 2006

alternative: a better michael richards apology

(disclaimer - this didn't happen. It would have been better for everyone if it did.)

Dave: And now we've got Michael Richards joining us over closed circuit from LA, hello Michael.

Michael: Hello Dave, thank you for giving me this opportunity to speak to your audience.

Dave: It's been a rough day, what happened?

Michael: I need to start by saying that there is no excuse for what I did on stage the other night, Dave. What I said was wrong, and I'm. . .I'm ashamed and sorry for the hurt I caused to anyone who witnessed it either there or later on the internet.

Dave: Sounds like you had some trouble with hecklers.

Michael: Hecklers are part of stand-up comedy, and no matter what they say, it's the job of the comic to keep his or her cool, and I didn't.

Dave: You has some rough words for them.

Michael: You can hear a lot of rough language in comedy clubs, but what I said went over the line. I lost my cool and in my anger my judgment failed me and I said some very mean, insulting and racist things to people who had paid good money to be there. They didn't deserve it, I didn't intend it, but it happened and I'm profoundly sorry.

Dave: So what's next for you?

Michael: What's next? I need to take some time to understand where those words came from in me. Racism is ignorant, it's hurtful, and I don't want it to be part of my life. I know what's funny, and racism isn't funny, and I just hope that after I've had a chance to reflect on this awful mistake that people will give me another chance to show them that I've learned from this.


Jerry: We're with you on this, Michael.

Michael: Thanks, Jerry.

Jerry: (smiles knowingly but a little painfully)

Dave: Well good luck, Michael, and thanks for being so open with us.

Micheae: Thank you, Dave, and I'm sorry we had to talk about this instead of all the other good things going on right now.

Dave: We'll save those until next time. Michael Richards, ladies and gentlemen.



Ron said...

Racism isn't funny? Huh?
You mean when Cleavon Little yells at a bunch o' crackers, "Hey, where the white women at?" or he and Gene Wilder (who's Jewish!) put on the Klansman outfits with the "Have a Nice Day" smiley faces that ain't funny? And don't tell me that humor isn't playing with the racist idea!

That's just the tip of the iceberg!

We may not like it, but hell, we laugh at it!

Richards hit a nerve, but he didn't put the nerve there...

He should have apologized on a news program, not Letterman, which sent a mixed message.

Ron said...

Wait, I forgot the appropriate racial slur from Blazing Saddles for ack/nak!

"All right! We'll give some land to the niggers, and the chinks. But we don't want the Irish!"

Mel Brooks: Equal opportunity offender!

bob said...

Everything can be funny - except when it isn't funny. M. Richards wasn't funny. He started out not being funny, he failed to become funny, and he ended without an ounce of funny. He didn't even try.

Cleavon Little was funny.

Anonymous said...

I don't get it, its ok for blacks to call each other the N word but if Kramer does its bad. Its ok for blacks to screw everything that moves, generate tons of spawn and leave them for welfare to take care of too.

Until blacks start taking responsibility for themselves there will always be niggers.

bob said...

Words are tools which gain life when backed with intent. When used to hurt, to insult and degrade, they are bad words. When they are used as a term of endearment, they are good words.

When you, my anonymous reader, elect to use the word 'nigger' as you have, it is a bad word - a word charged with generations of ignorance and hate.

Racism is wrong, it is ignorant, it is a sign of a closed mind that seeks easy definitions to save it from uncertainty.

What is amazing to me is that the same intelligence that is used to go online, find this blog, read a post, find the comment button, leave a comment and use the word verification function can't be used to realize that the thinking demonstrated in the comment is flawed. Go figure.

That said, thanks for your comment.